09 Nov

Busted with Ciku Muiruri

Busted is a fake prank radio show hosted by Ciku Muiruri and some other dude I have yet to know. Despite being hip to the fact that everything that happens on the show is scripted and therefore fake, I’m going to write this post assuming it’s real and that there’s fairly a chance your girlfriend or wife might actually call the show, and make Ciku prank you into spilling the beans of the secret going-ons between you and your down-low lover that you’ve NEVER suspected your partner might one day find out.

Here’s what happens on the show: someone’s wife or girlfriend (read: someone with good acting skills) will call the show, suspecting her boyfriend or husband is a love rat. Some of the women will even give the name of the other woman they suspect their husband is banging on the side.

Ciku will then proceed to call the hubby, informing him of a contest he has won, and that he’s required to bring with him his better half on the supposedly romantic vacation.

Of course no dude with a hottie of a mistress will want to bring their plain wives to such a treat. So they’ll suggest taking their sidekicks with them instead.

Meanwhile, the wife will be listening to the conversation quietly, waiting to catch him on the decision he makes.

In the event that the husband falls for the prank by suggesting anyone other than his girlfriend or wife, the wife will come out hysterically lashing and being over-dramatic on air (kudos for the kind of act0rs you choose). Some will be all in sobs, bowled over and asking in disbelief why he cheated.

Rarely will you see the guys going on the offensive, by turning the tables on their played wives and accusing them of being melodramatic and blowing things out of proportion. That’s when you know it’s fake.

But in the event that Ciku decides to prove us wrong by making a real prank, and out of bad luck, you happen to be the man on the other side of the line getting busted. How do you plan to get out of the ordeal with both your dignity and marriage/relationship fully intact?

Here’s my plan:

I won’t rush to get defensive. I’ll instead maintain my cool. Let her vent. Let her call me whatever ugly name she can come up with.

I won’t hung up on her. But wait until she takes a breather. Then tell her how much I think she’s still beautiful, and amid all the lashing and screaming, I still see the beautiful woman that I fell in love with and I’m NOT planning to stop loving her any time soon.

I’ll then hung up the phone. Cut off any contact and disappear for a week or two. Then show up and fuck the hell out of her without explaining a thing.

It’s only after the sex that I’ll tell her that she blew everything out of proportion, but it’s all good if she’s willing to put everything behind us and have a fresh start. 

 

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